**Past Experience**

Maybe similar to other "shy" people, I was considered to be shy or not brave enough when I was little, because I didn't speak VERY often like those active people. Teachers would tell my parents I needed to participate more in class discussions. Friends would sometimes ask why I was so quiet at parties.

But was I really shy? Or just introverted?

**My Journey**

After growing up and experiencing a lot, I found out something different. I speak really well when I am well prepared for certain things with a clear purpose in my mind. And then I usually impress people around with my speech.

During college, I discovered that when I thoroughly researched a topic for a presentation, I could speak confidently and articulately. In my professional life, I've given talks at conferences that received excellent feedback. The difference wasn't that I suddenly became an extrovert – it was that I approached speaking differently.

**Mindset Shifts That Helped Me**

**1. Gladly accept I am an introvert and believe it is ok not to speak too often.**

Society often values extroversion, treating it as the default or preferred way of being. I had to unlearn this bias. Being an introvert isn't something to fix or overcome – it's simply a different way of processing the world. Some of history's greatest thinkers, artists, and leaders have been introverts.

**2. Not speaking doesn't mean not being confident. For me, confidence comes from good preparation.**

I realized that my reluctance to speak wasn't always about confidence – it was about having something worthwhile to say. When I'm well-prepared, I feel confident. This means doing research before meetings, thinking through my points before social gatherings, or simply taking time to process my thoughts before responding.

**3. When I speak, I speak about the most essential points that convince most people.**

Quality over quantity. I've learned that people remember and value one insightful comment more than ten forgettable ones. By focusing on making meaningful contributions rather than filling silence, I've found my voice is actually heard more clearly.

**My Tips For You**

If you're an introvert who wants to become more comfortable speaking with groups:

**For structured situations (meetings, presentations):** - Try to prepare the points you want to bring up during that meeting - Write down key thoughts beforehand - Practice what you might say for important points - Give yourself permission to take notes and refer to them

**For casual conversations:** - Be a good listener first – this takes pressure off and gives you material to respond to - Think, pause, and then speak clearly – don't rush yourself - Focus on quality contributions rather than quantity - Connect one-on-one with people when possible, which is often more comfortable for introverts

**Remember that introversion is a strength, not a weakness.** Our tendency to think deeply before speaking, observe carefully, and process internally gives us unique perspectives that more vocal people might miss.

The world needs both introverts and extroverts. The key isn't becoming someone you're not – it's learning how to leverage your natural tendencies while developing skills to communicate effectively when you choose to.

Have you found strategies that help you navigate speaking situations as an introvert? I'd love to hear what's worked for you.